So, posting long after I should be in bed. Another depressing, sleepless night. So, going to post tonight what I was going to post tomorrow. Maybe it will take my mind off of things and help me sleep some tonight.
So recap of what is going to happen Monday. I am going to start a modified P90X program with the the Chest and Back DVD. I am going to follow the original program, minus the Ab Ripper X, with the strength workouts, modifying the 'cardios' though. I am going to cycle through sprinting, Plyometrics (or Cardio X if pylo proves to hard), Kenpo X, and maybe a kettlebell snatch, clean, and swing workout or a weight carry workout, explained tomorrow (not 100% sure yet).
P90X goes against some of my fundemental beliefs with training. Body part workouts versus intense, full body lifting sessions. Use of the term 'cardio'....but I have modified it to fit my beliefs where I could. I know people who have seen amazing results with P90X, so I can at least try it. It's 90 days. Its a crash course. Than I can go back to what I like when I am at a new and improved level of fitness. And I feel like, right now, at this starting point, I need the extra motivation and help to get going.
I will also start retaking my supplements. A tablespoon of cod liver oil a day. ProBiotics. Maybe digestive enzymes. And a high quality protein shake. And I feel like Im missing something...but my mind is jambled.
My diet will be the same as previously listed.
I will also start a gratitude journal on Monday. And retakeup (is that a word?) meditation. My life feels like its in the shits right now. I really hate parts of my life right now, feel very lost and alone. And I really miss someone who means a lot to me. While there isnt much I can really do to fix some of the situations, and while part of me deeply fears that I may have lost the most important person in my life, I need to do something to settle my mind and spirit, otherwise this whole thing will never work. It cant work if Im not getting sleep, depressed, and unmotivated.
So yeah, time to attempt to sleep now. Probably post some more tomorrow when more lucid. Or...later today technically.